Hic Sunt Dracones

What the hell Sky… I haven’t been here two weeks, and you’ve already tried to get me to watch Death Race three times? and Bond twice? This is why you can’t have nice things.

Play this game icycle (c/- Waxy), and per Heq’s request, go watch Role Models. Hold him responsible though… He likes to be held.

Went for a run Sunday afternoon, down to the viaduct, around to the bridge and back to the hotel. Then I walked into a glass door. In my defence I was wearing sunglasses (it was sunny!) and was sweating and a bit stuffed. The door had always been open for the week I’ve been staying here, and, and, OK. I’m a dumb arse. Didn’t walk into it at speed, and immediately burst out laughing at my incompetence – which I think greatly relieved the two staff that bore witness to my skills (of an artist).

The next day I dropped a pie on my foot. I was actually dropping it on the floor at the time, but I have this habit of trying to catch things with my foot in circumstances such as this. In the case of dropping a glass, or some types of food, it might be a good plan – and might prevent unnecessary breakages. In the case of a pie, it is perhaps less wise. Luckily for my shiny shoes the pie did not shatter.

CIA Agent: Uh, sir he drove off the roof.
Noah Vosen: What?
CIA Agent: He drove off the roof!

On Sunday another guy from work arrived for the week, he’s Indian and being the culturally sensitive guy that I am, on Monday I suggested we hit up the local Indian restaurant I’d spotted (underneath Denny’s natch) he knew it from the last time he was here and was game. So off we went. He doesn’t talk much, so I rambled on for most of the meal. Luckily he’s interested in NZ and I have some details to burn on that subject. At the end of the meal he put down his fork and said, “You know – Melbourne’s Indian restaurants are all shit. This place is significantly better than any of them.”

Dark Knight is a rad film. And Quantum of Solace is also pretty pro. Judy Dench is an excellent M.

M: When someone says that they have people everywhere, you expect it to be hyperbole. Lots of people say that. Florists use that expression. It doesn’t mean that they have people in the bloody room.

I wish I was a secret agent or at least had secret aaaaaagent monies.

I wonder what chance I have of scoring a chick by claiming, to quote Mr Bond, that “I can’t find the um… the stationary. Do you want to help me look?”

Having said that, it’d be bad news for pretty much anyone I meet as Bond’s acquaintances don’t tend to last long, and his liaisons are even more fleeting. HAHA! premature. Suspect it won’t stop Daniel Craig getting ALL the ladies.

Using me for my money, then telling me a quarter mil ain’t good enough.

A quarter mil’s always good!

It was good then, and it’s sure in hell still good now.

In Brisbane I got to watch Tropic Thunder which while looking amusing enough really hadn’t passed the “will pay money for it” test at the pic-a-tures, and wasn’t high on my list of things to do in Denver, while I was dead. However, Foxtel a go go and I have the following pronouncements to make.

1) Tom Cruise is awesome. Both in general, in allegiance to the mighty space aliens, and of course more importantly for being Les:

Les Grossman: And who here is the key grip?
Les Grossman: You? You! Hit that director in the face, really fucking hard!

He also dances. And makes phone calls.

2) “I don’t know what it’s called; I only know the sound it makes when it LIES!” wins as a quote.

The hotel here has a nice big television for me to watch things on, which is nice. However it’s stuck in non wide screen mode, and Sky keeps playing all its movies in wide screen mode. Pout?

In conclusion, I reiterate that everyone should watch Sex Drive.

Oh, just gave up on Pineapple Express, and what’s on TV2? Whores don’t get second chances. And you know that for sure.

PS. I’m a lead farmer MOTHER FUCKER.

Pete was here a few days ago, or probably more. We went on a wine trail tour thing in the Yarra Valley. Which is to say the others did. Except actually even then, one of the others was driving, so no(t much) drinking for her. Which left Kat and Pete, who didn’t really do it justice from what I understand of the norm of these things… I did my best, which actually went better than you’d expect in that I bought some wine.

Fuck yeah I did. Didn’t see that coming did you? At lunch (start of said tour) we were at some place and I thought, why the hell not, I’ll sample their dessert wine. And it was, as so many terrible (and not so terrible) drinks announce themselves “drinkable.” So I went to buy it.

As I stood in the queue I pondered how I was actually able to drink it and not go “blurrrgh wine.” turns out it was a huge 5% booze. So yeah… pretty much grape juice in a girly bottle.

I didn’t mention it was a sissy drink did I? Well I’m sure you assumed it must be given I drank it, but yes, this wasn’t really a dessert wine, so much as a certain I don’t know what. Pink Moscato – I’d say try it some summer evening. Or if you’re a sissy like me, try it whenever the hell you want. Or you could just buy sparkling grape juice, like I do.

Also, I’m in Auckland for work. But by happy coincidence my parents are here on holiday, which is nice.

Dear Microsoft – Please allow IIS to be downloaded by the OS from the intertube, and or just copy it to the HDD during installation. You’re not exactly going for a minimal install footprint as it is are you? So a few more megs for IIS shouldn’t cause enough complaints to make me care. More than happy for you to leave it uninstalled by default, but dammit – every time I have to go and find a disc* just to add IIS to one of my existing machines? It sucks massive moose cock.

Hugs (not drugs)
Me.

*: or image, or ISO or set up some shenanigans when monkeying with VMs or encode it onto the disc using magnets and a stopwatch.

Saturday night YouTube fest!

They’re remaking The Prisoner, and I’m excited. (Gandalf is #2)

Unrelated: Family Guy is awesome, and Seth McFarlane must be a strange dude.

PS. Name 20. Name six more. Name five more.

PPS. Shut up, that’s why.

And we’re clear.